But I will sing of your strength, in the morning I will sing of your love; for you are my fortress, my refuge in times of trouble.17 You are my strength, I sing praise to you; you, God, are my fortress, my God on whom I can rely. Psalm 59:16-17 NIV
You know how singing usually makes you feel better? Sometimes it doesn’t. How I know I am really down is when I can’t even sing. We all have dry seasons like that, where we are struggling with something that just isn’t going to change anytime soon. The road ahead looks about the same as the road we are standing on. Life has disappointed us and it is hard to sing when you wanted life to go another way.
We have lost our hope. We have been let down. We want to feel sorry for ourselves. After all, don’t we deserve to be upset with such a long-lasting trial? Yes, we do. We are human and these emotions will come. However, just because we do not feel like being hopeful or positive, does not mean that Hope is not there. He is!
How many times God waited patiently for me to get over myself and accept His plan for His reasons. Never in a million years did I see certain things occurring in my life, namely a divorce! I was a good girl, after all and tried hard in my marriage. But… I was let down, hurt, in danger and manipulated. How could God allow that person put me through all that? Why didn’t He stop him somehow? Why didn’t He change my husband’s heart so he would love me again?
I had no choice but to lean heavily on God during those times. Such a sweet closeness and communication between Him and I developed, unlike any I had ever had before. Rather, I returned to the fervor and love I felt for Him as a brand new Christian. Why am I telling you this? I am telling you this because I have learned the hard way what leaning on God really means. I also know, for sure, that you have experienced severe hurt in one way or another. It makes one angry and wanting to give up on hoping for good things again. But…hope really is there. Our God is a God of hope. We are well-loved. God has reasons and plans that make no sense to us, but we have to trust Him. We can learn and lean while we go through a trial, and trust our Creator. Why would our creator NOT love His creations?
They say “Time heals all wounds?” No, not necessarily. Time, alone, is sometimes not enough. Heart wounds need care and attention, often a change of heart, things that only God can make happen. I say, “Time with God heals all wounds.”
I hope today, that you are able to sing of how strong and wise and loving God is, even if you do not feel that way all the time. Let Him carry You, teach you and teach you how to love Him better. When we go to God in desperation, He comes to us desperate to be our priority and lifesaver.
P.S. Though God hates divorce, He did allow me a second chance at love. I am happily married now. He also taught me that true love comes first from Him. It is a pure and lasting love in a relationship when God is kept at the top, center and middle and everywhere in-between.
I hope this all makes sense and I hope you look up and see Hope is always there. Because our Savior lives, we can know He held the past but also the future!
Love to all,